An Official First Ever Zombie Rant
“If you honestly believe having pieces of myself falling everywhere is some kind of a great kick in the pants (much less the need to go back and collect them, well okay, mostly I don’t do that, unless I see a dog, like, chewing on a piece and well, that’s just gross) but come on lighten up already! And those movies … Aww come on already!”
“So do you really think that being among the undead is something I coveted, something that I couldn’t wait to happen. (actually I’m not precisely sure how it happened – it just did!) Exactly what do you think I’m supposed to do with myself? Well more precisely the various pieces of myself.”
“Yeah, I’m ticked off about stuff. You would be too. How’d you like to wake up and be …well, like me.”
“The average day spent groping about for direction, I still don’t have a clue of what I’m supposed to be doing, ya’ know, my M.O. (so to speak). So I hang out with other undeads, I have an in there, naturally, but then there’s this “like” group of us milling around. Although I have to say it was exceedingly groovy and cool to help Michael Jackson in “Thriller”. Who knew we could dance like that? We didn’t even need a choreographer, it just came naturally. Those awesome funky moves, I mean.”
“So there you have it. I (we) need serious direction because well, we’re basically clueless, kind of like Buffy the vampire killer, so we do what we do because … we do. The redundancy of our redundancy kind of thing … did that go over your head? I hope?
“I like to think of myself as being a somewhat intellectual zombie! Smarter than the average zombie. I wonder? Are all we zombies ‘average’, you know the same as? Or are we individuals, unique onto our selves (parts and pieces)? Sigh, heavy thoughts for one to contemplate. Over my head or off my head, as the case may be. The thoughts get lighter than … ha, ha. See a sense of humor too!”
“I’m thinking there has to be more to it then that. Okay so that’s my rant. Enjoy the video. Oh, and if you can come up with any thoughts on what my focus as a zombie should be – let me know, in the mean time, I’ll stay “Sleepless in Seattle”! Yeah I do puns really well! Oh and it’s okay if this goes viral … I’m totally cool with that also!”
“Your zombie friend, borrowing Penny’s THE WHY ABOUT THIS space (thank you Penny), so I could rant!”
Love and hugs (“I thought that was a nice friendly ending, but you probably wouldn’t really want to hug me – unless you want to take part of the hug with you, literally speaking”).
I. M. A. Zombie