Don’t Let Them Win!

We Are A Caring Blogging Community!

The Facebook, easy going or in your face attitude, that can include a “lack of manners” mentality seems to be infiltrating WordPress. I have been to several excellent blogs in the last few days whose authors have been considering leaving their blogging friends because of extremely rude behavior by a few bloggers who follow them (in most cases these other bloggers also have Facebook media pages).

Being rude and inappropriate seems to be the norm on many Facebook sites. But up until recently I had not found this sort of nastiness in the WordPress Blogging Community.

It saddens me and I encourage others who have been encountering this sort of behavior to block, remove and unfollow these (hurtful and mean) individuals but most importantly – keep on keeping on with your blogging, inspiring the rest of us as you have been.

It only takes a few rotten apples to spoil the barrel. Let’s not let that happen here. We are a creative and supportive family and community of bloggers who are sensitive, caring, loving and most of all responsible with manners for proper behavior when being interactive,  commenting and appropriately sharing with some one else’s, hard earned and welcoming, creative blog site!

If this is happening on your blog to you – reach out to other bloggers, they do care and will be supportive. That’s what the blogging community is all about, in my opinion anyway!

~ Penny

61 thoughts on “Don’t Let Them Win!

  1. I have heard about these not so nice bloggers and there is no need for rudeness.

    I had a comment that I didn’t approve, as I found it a bit offensive and I thought it may be offensive to other bloggers. It was not about me or aimed at other bloggers but it was response to a blog post I had written about meeting and speaking with HM the Queen. It may have been just a joke and if it was, some people may have found it funny but I wasn’t sure. I am still in contact with this blogger via my blog and I have had no other problems with comments they have written, so I may be over-reacting but not sure?

    • I find gut instincts work pretty well, Sandra. We can all over-react to things but most people honestly do know when they are writing something that may be taken as offensive. I’m thinking you were right to not approve it and it sent a gentle message to the person commenting as well! Good job, my friend! 🙂 xo

  2. I’m afraid rudeness is endemic — both in the society at large, and online — the way to do deal with rude people is to ignore em. they won’t go away, but it frustrates em when you don’t react, and they finally go find someone else to play with.

  3. Peeps can say whatever they like as long as it is not offensive to others on my Space, luckily here in WP I have not encountered many that are rude, there are some instances but they were dealt with straight away without anyone being upset by them.

    I don’t moderate comments, just do not allow anything that is insulting…

    I hope that you are enjoying your Monday Penny 🙂

    Andro xxx

  4. There is no need for anyone to leave, we can moderate our Spaces how we choose and if anyone steps out of line by insulting someone or indeed showing a lack of respect, then they can be blocked 🙂

    Poor behaviour is something widespread these days but it doesn’t mean that we as a community have to suffer, we just throw them out, it is as simple as that my great friend 🙂

    I do not allow any negativity on my
    Space, that is just NOT going to happen 🙂

    Have a lovely day today Penny 🙂 😉

    Andro xxx

  5. I am so sorry to hear this. Fortunately I have not experienced it, but my posts are so specific I probably don’t attract random commenters. Facebook is something I have never tried. I do have a Google+ page, but I just repost my posts, there, and never ever ever get a comment. Sometimes I think I might like to try Facebook, but your post tells me that maybe I shouldn’t enter those waters……

    • Well I’m glad you haven’t. I admit I’m not a lover of Facebook, for the reasons, mentioned. But there are some very nice Facebook pages out there, with excellent commentary, interactions and sharing going on. I think part of the problem there is if a “bad apple” gets in, it spreads quickly because of how the Facebook media platform is laid out, in other words, it can be difficult to have control over what’s coming into your page and then where it goes. Just my thoughts on this though …

  6. Thank you for this note Penny. One of the things I love about WordPress is that the people here are very kind, supportive and respectful. Some people on FB are like that, but unfortunately many are not, especially of some of us writer types.
    Debra

  7. That’s why I’m very upfront in my “Comments Policy” page. I still haven’t needed to block anyone…once they realize that I don’t moderate in harsh or ugly comments, they go away by themselves! 😛

  8. I began moderating the comments on my blog after a nastly comment that a family member left for me. It seems he found it personally embarassing the @#@ that I write and he hoped by mentioning it to me that I would stop. I have no problem with having errors pointed out to me or even suggestions on how to better a piece..but insults are pure meanness. I left a group when one of the members took it upon herself to be judge of what was “proper”. I don’t need that in my life. It has taken me a long time to heal psychologically and I’m not turning back. I am very careful about the groups and blogs I follow and always moderate comments ( as much for me as others who read them). I wish we could do like survivor and kick offenders off of the island..

    • Yes, I also had an experience like this with a family member, sigh. I agree on every single one of your points, completely! Yes, it would be nice … but then we are survivors in life aren’t we … a good thing for us! 🙂

    • I’m glad to hear that Lauren. To the small handful that it occurred this past week, it was surprising to me, as they each have very inspirational type of blogs. So hopeful it remains a rare thing here for all of us! 🙂 xo

  9. I haven’t experienced any ugliness nor have I seen any since beginning to blog almost one year ago. I can imagine and have no doubt that it happens. I wonder what human trait(s) plays in such behavior – immaturity, jealously, just plain meanness, boredom?

    If one does not like a blog for some reason and the opinions expressed there, just ignore and go on.

    • Exactly so Sheila! Like you, I will sometimes (not all that often though) go to a blog and not care for it so I’ll just leave, as you say! If I found the topic interesting and opinion generating, I will express mine in a polite way. There is never a reason to be unpleasant. I’m sure all the above reasons you mentioned played in. Still it is hurtful, hence the purpose of this post, to remind those inspirational bloggers, I spoke of, to stay encouraged and creative with their own blogs! Thank you for taking the time to comment!

  10. I quite agree with you Penny! But I remain convinced that the brotherhood of these blogs will be and will remain the largest and only a handful of disruptive will not because of our friendship.
    Have a good day Penny 😉

    • Thank you Gys! You are correct. There are too many wonderfully caring and supportive bloggers out there! You have a peaceful evening and an excellent week ahead, and I am so happy to have you as a blogging friend! 🙂 xx

  11. I see a deeper meaning to what you’ve posted, Penny. It seems to be the basic, the seeds, of our very own civil law, that started long ago in England, and perhaps goes back to the beginning of time. How do we operate in a civilized society when allowing, tolerating, bad behavior. There’s a huge difference between civility and freedom of speech. One can certainly learn to make a point, disagree, express a differing view, in a way that is not offensive. I for one applaud your post here. Thank you. Paulette

    • So very true, Paulette. All your words are “on point” here. Thank you very much, I appreciate your taking the time to comment on what I believe is an important issue, as you remind, not just online but in all of our personal interactions with others! xx

  12. Penny – Thank you for this blog and a thank you to Alistar for reblogging it. I definitely support your stance. Yesterday I read a reply to an opinion piece that was less than pleasant. You write some of the most beautiful poetry and prose I have the honor of reading. While I write about government-eaz much of the time, it is still one woman’s opinion. I’m giving serious consideration to taking my Facebook page down. It’s the weakest link for security and last Oct when we were hacked to the tune of several thousand dollars cancelling Facebook seems like a good decision.

    • Thank you Sheri, I’m so glad you do voice and share your opinions. It is how we can reach others and it also helps us to view our own thoughts in the process and to be interactive with others on any given subject.

      I am sorry you encountered that unpleasantness yesterday. There is never a need for rudeness, it shows an appalling lack of poor manners, as well as no consideration for the other person’s point of view.

      Your opinion matters and can influence (these are good things). I am sorry about your experience with Facebook, there does seem to be a few real problems there for more than a few. Do keep writing your opinions though, it is important to be heard for you and your followers Sheri … take care of you and thank you so much for your comments, so greatly appreciated by me. You show your blog community love here, my friend! xx

    • And lots and lots of love to you, check back in later on (if you get a chance), I think you’ll find a few more caring bloggers will be commenting about this as well, far more caring bloggers than the other kind!!!! xx

  13. Hey Penny,
    🙂
    I’ve had one bad experience on another persons blog after I had commented. This person took my comment way out of context, and the person I followed went back and forwards in my defence. It was sooooo horrible and made me wonder if I wanted to continue commenting on other blogs. Then I realised It was just one person and a total misunderstanding. But it does make me think twice about what I’m saying. If this happened everyday? No way would I continue to blog. We are a family/community and as a whole… bloggers are very supportive of one another.
    Hugs to you. Paula xxxx

  14. I agree with you wholeheartedly. I love WordPress because of the community and I will take your advice regarding those who want to destroy this community. I would not want blogging to follow the path of other social media.

  15. I’ve not seen any of the rude behaviour, but I think it is despicable that people would do that to other people. There is nothing wrong with creative criticism, but in my opinion, destructive criticism should be dealt with. As you say, don’t let them get you down. Leave the Facebook stuff with the children. I always thought that people on WordPress were more adult than that.

    Unless of course it is me that has upset people, in which case I apologise.

      • Nothing accidental then. It is awful that people decided to be like this. What do they hope to gain? Do they go out of their way to try and make peoples lives miserable because they have no joy themselves? It is abominable.

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