Inferno of Emptiness

In between happy memories and heartache,

there are the days when it still can’t be born.

Days consumed with my awareness of loss.

 Some days – feelings are ignored, muted, dealt with,

and yet … and yet

there are days

when the need is so strong,

when the “lack of” …  so overwhelming,

the feeling of being so alone and lonely,

it is then, I realize you’re still here,

in my heart,

my mind,

my thoughts,

my being,

and the longing becomes searing, burning pain,

melting tears into little pieces of lost love

and I cry myself to sleep within an inferno of emptiness.

Penny L Howe, 2014

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The Tears of our Life and the Strength of our Convictions!

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“Humanity will owe its survival in the future – as in the past – to those with the strength of their convictions who carry on through the compassion of their tears …  despite the burden of their fears.”

Penny L Howe, 2014

Which reminds me ladies (of the U.S.A.) you will be voting in your state elections this year, right? Most important for you to do so … MOST!

The Mirror Of Your Dreams

 

Memory’s rainbow rivulets,

reflecting fallen tears.

Hidden dreams lay dormant

behind the clouded years.

~

Eyes are keeping secrets

And yet as time goes by,

The colored rainbows answer,

falling from the eye.

~

Born upon the teardrops

revealing hidden gleams,

witness then, your memories –

in the mirror of your dreams.

~Penny L Howe, 2014

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Everyone have a wonderful dream filled weekend!

~ Penny

 

The Strength of A Woman!

 © Satori13 | Dreamstime.com

Tears of Compassion

Tears do not make one weak. The salty liquid flows freely into the wounds of our trials, increasing resolve and determination to make things better – equal – balanced.

When looking at one of the symbols for justice, you will see it’s represented by a blindfolded female holding the balance scale. I’ve always found that intriguing and representative of how a woman’s role has historically been viewed – still is.

It is increasingly obvious that it is not the woman who is blinded by what she is or isn’t, but rather she is blindfolded by those who see her as – less than.

Personal strength is not about being more physically capable (although all bullies consider it so), strength is also about character, determination, our individual willingness and ability to care. To balance all of our human attributes with greater awareness and understanding and always with compassion. When a woman cries she demonstrates this – crying is not weakness. I repeat – not a weakness.

The sad truth is, too often, weakness of character manifests into physical brutality by an otherwise weak individual – to get their way. Winning by being mean, physically/verbally abusive and in the extreme, killing other people (even in the name of war) is often the easy way out. War achieves first and foremost – death and misery. Power, and the misguided belief “might makes right” has been in existence since the beginning of our caveman days,  and continues on today in many areas of society, government, and big business.

A woman’s compassion is one of humanity’s greatest survival strengths. A man’s physical strength poses for him some of his greatest’s blind-spots and handicaps. Most women want to protect all life, inherently a part of their nurturing nature, and a large part of their strength.

Those who view women as “lesser than” also tend to consider life as just another commodity to be used – as needs be. Again history bears this out. So does the repeated raping and brutality of women, children and the planet itself that we ALL live on.

Universally recognizing the female’s important and ‘completely equal’ half in the “human equation of life”, along with her amazing and natural strengths, can only assist mankind in truly becoming more balanced – it’s time for the blindfold to be gone.

© Satori13 | Dreamstime.com

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“Humanity will owe its survival in the future – as in the past –

to those with caring compassion and tears.”

~

Thank you,

Penny L Howe, 2014

I Thirst – For the Waters of Life!

I Thirst

for …

emotional flavors,

beautiful vistas,

unfolding riches,

from the bounty of life.

I find,

exotic sensations,

beauty, wealth, comfort

to surround me.

I am blessed

with the waters of life.

~

But am I worthy of this liquid wellspring?

Am I – greed and grasping,

or

humble, respectful, careful

of Earth’s diminishing resources.

I become fearful,

that I,

through wanton indifference,

will end my days

sipping polluted tears

from my eyes …

a witness,

as

the waters of life run dry,

due entirely to …

my

unquenchable thirst for life!

~ Penny L Howe, 2014

Today is World Water Day. Find out why, and what this means to you and I, and our families future sustainability – before the well runs dry for all of us!

https://www.facebook.com/UNWorldWaterDay

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“Did you know that dewdrops are very like teardrops? 

They glisten on the flesh of the petal

reminding us of the beauty of a caring heart.”

Penny L Howe, 2013

An Angel’s tears of Gold ~ the value of life!

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They found her in the early morning, she was curled up in a fetal position inside the depression of a large rock. The sharp cool tang of mountain mist still clinging to low hanging clouds. They had almost missed her, except for an ethereal glow that surrounded her … and those sounds; unearthly, softly penetrating.

Not the kind of sound you associate from hearing, but one felt inside your mind, your heart. A mourning, soul searing sound that was gut wrenching in it’s sadness.

The children found her first and then the adult villagers came. All standing quietly, a few feet away staring in awe. They’d never seen an angel before. And no one had ever heard of an angel crying.

The villagers spoke quietly between themselves in whispers. “Do angels cry?” “What’s she doing here?” “How did she get here?” “Why is she here?”

And then a small child spoke the words that were foremost in everyone’s thoughts, “Why is she crying?”

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No one knew.

The crowds grew larger during the day, still standing respectfully at a distance but when the clouds cleared away they noticed her teardrops turning to gold as they landed by her feet and trickled into the crevaces pooling around her.

“Look” one of the villagers shouted. She’s crying tears of gold, all else was forgotten as the crowd surged forward to collect the fallen golden teardrops that lay everywhere around the little angel. But before they could reach her they began to hear a second sound. This one more like a soft growing thunder in the sky.

Above them they saw first one and then another until there was gathered above them a mighty host of angels, soaring and gliding angrily above and around the sobbing little angel. Her tear drops rolling down her pale cheeks turning into sparkling gold as each one struck the rocks making a small pinging noise.

The hovering angels swooped down forming a protective circle around the angel.

The villager’s were angry but wary of the large angels. “Why do you stop us, one asked, “there is gold laying here. “Ours for the taking.”

One of the Angels landed in front of the speaker. “Do you know the true value of each of these teardrops?” He asked. “Do you truly understand what you are racing to have?”

file5731254296930There was silence.

“Then I will tell you.” He gestured to the crying angel. “She, our most special little one, is the true guardian angel for all human life on your Earth. For countless millenium she has watched mankind kill one another. First for survival, then from fear, then from mistaken religious beliefs and power and now from greed.

Today, on your planet, the worth and value of your civilization is not based on the health and well being of each human but on how much money you have. She has waited and waited for humans to learn that there is no greater value than the worth of a single human life, and you have not learned this.

And so now, for each human killed by another human, she sheds a tear of gold. And that is the value of her tears of gold. Each fallen tear, a fallen human life. She thinks, hopefully, you might actually understand if she cries enough tears while you continue to take each other’s lives (as if it is something that was ever acceptable) while making creative excuses used to rationalize the truth  (unwillingness to be involved, beliefs, intolerance, power, riches,) your inability and unwillingness to understand, grow and learn.

So here’s the lesson for today. Each time a human willfully takes or allows the life of another to be taken there is a new rate of exchange to think on “A golden teardrop = one human life!” It really is about understanding the value and worth of what is really important! Life is – anything less is not acceptable!

~

Penny L Howe,

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A young boys words

This is Jack. He’s Emma’s older brother. At the start of the weekend of his 10th upcoming birthday he, his dad and mom were busily redoing his bedroom in preparation for his birthday party to be shared by family and friends. He was very excited and really looking forward to it.

Jack and his dad had just finished putting up the new shelves on the walls in his room when his dad got a call from someone. They needed his help to move a larger size aquarium from their home. As always his dad (a generous and kind man) said he’d be right over. Jack, Emma, Jordan and their mom never saw him again.Just a few blocks away he was struck and killed by a meth using driver who failed to yield.

When I wrote “Ethereal Life” and spoke of …in a heartbeat it can be gone… it was true and extremely personal. Just a few days ago Jack had picked the puff ball and was demonstrating to me how quickly it could be blown away, that was when I got the inspiration to write the poem.

I have watched this family struggle for the past two years since the most devastating day of their life.

In Jack’s case it was particularily hard. It happened during what would have been a celebration of his birthday. Jack is a very special boy. He is highly sensitive, he see’s most things in black and white. Borderline Aspergers, intellectually off the charts, but in a few areas, emotionally immature. Prior to his dad’s death he was well on his way to overcoming many of the characteristics common to his type of personality. After his fathers death there was a reversal, but slowly he’s progressing forward again.

On the day of his dad’s eulogy, the family’s church was packed with people. Hundreds. His dad had been well loved and admired in the community for his many acts of kindness and giving. The pastor standing in the front of the gathering had asked all those with a special memory of this man to stand and share. Many did, one after another. Towards the end the pastor asked if there was anyone else who wished to share.

And then amazingly, young Jack who is not an outgoing boy at all, solemnly stood up and turned to the very large group of gathered family & friends and stated … I have some things to share about my dad. And then the most heart breaking, soul wrenching words came forth from him. He held himself upright and spoke quietly and with dignity about the dad he knew and loved.

He spoke of his love and about all the things he would miss and why he loved him so much. In closing he said he was glad his dad was in heaven but he was really going to miss him. Then he quietly said “that’s all” and sat down. The silence in the large filled room that day was broken by the sound of many – crying  tears of sadness over Jack’s earnest young words.

As I said Jack is very special. He’s introspective about people & life. If you’ve been following my blog you met his sister Emma recently when she posted a blog of her own. Jack watched and the other day he approached me and asked if he could post a blog too. Of course I said yes. For him to reach out and share is a sign of some very good things happening in his mind.

For those of you who have commented on Emma’s Post, she is most grateful and I thank you. In a little while soon I will post Jack’s first blog. He is as excited about it as I am for him and his wanting to reaching out to others. I will be most appreciative of all who read this today if you can take just a few minutes to come back, read and comment to him when Jack’s Post appears. Again thank you.